Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Part 4: Strangers With Candy



Once upon a time in a land called The Bay Area, a boy was lost.





He normally isn't so bad with directions, but he finds himself in an unfamiliar part of town.

He continues to wander, 

when seemingly out of nowhere

a cloud of smoke appears behind him,

followed by a strong gust of wind!

He turns to  find that
someone had emerged directly behind him!

The A.L.O.H.A. 2000, with the Companion Algorithm already programmed, awaited her first command.


Those...  Weren't commands.  (they were questions)

The boy had a place to find, so he excused himself.

But thinking this woman might be a local, he told her to help him out.

And just like that, the companion algorithm, which according to Stan's programming, dictates that she help her companion out when he or she needs it.

The A.L.O.H.A. 2000 proceeded to mark her new partner.



And proceeded to help out with directions.


And as it turns out, the boy might be bad with directions after all.



The boy gave The A.L.O.H.A. 2000 an AUDI 5000 and also her next command. 


To see him



later

The A.L.O.H.A 2000 disappeared into the ether to carry out her next command.


But when exactly is... Later?

Puzzled, the boy wondered if he imagined the entire encounter.
To be concluded with Part 5.
Part 4:  END

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Part 3: The A.L.O.H.A. 2000

Part 3:  The A.L.O.H.A. 2000




The inability to name things well gets worse as Stan makes perhaps the most redundant and pointless acronym in robot naming history.

But first, Stan continues to make his obnoxious claims during a Q&A during the 1995 AMSTRACTS.


Red Fangs?


Picture Slate?  Is he plucking these names out of thin air? And what is this odd device that Stan is holding?  It looks like something straight from Deep Space 9!


 Well that's just silly. 


 Is that even a thing?


Wait what now?


Perhaps Stan has been investing too much time in Science Fiction movies.




That escalated quickly.




This is just crazy talk.  To what purpose would a laser even serve?




Just in case the crowd wasn't paying attention, Stan reminds them exactly what he built.


ALMOST anything.


Stop asking.


Stan is referring to a silly greeting card he got for his mom one Mother's day years ago.  She didn't like it because it seemed more like a Halloween card.




Stan entered the companion algorithm, but what he didn't realize is that in loading the A.L.O.H.A. 2000 with it...




...  He accidentally activated her.


The A.L.O.H.A. 2000 opened her eyes



Stan had also mistakenly turned on her emergency teleport function.


A wind began to form around the A.L.O.H.A. 2000...


...  Because Stan's emergency teleport function has a default.


The vortex engulfed the entire auditorium...


...  And just like that, all of Stan's research...


...  His life's work...


...  Was all gone.


Stan fell to his knees...


The crowd at the 1995 Anime Mad Scientists Theoretical Robotics And Cybernetics Trade Show bared witness to the biggest anime mad science discovery since the giant space aircraft carrier and it simply vanished.  As time passed, this event would become a legend among anime mad scientists, most not believing that it really happened, because it's 1995.  The internet was barely even a thing.  Stan would eventually descend into madness, checking his picture slate every hour with the hopes that maybe one day the A.L.O.H.A. 2000 would finally emerge and check in.  But where did she go?  When did she go?

To Be Continued

Part 3:  End